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my name's Kirk. I work in visual effects for tv commercials. I have a big mouth. Please enjoy.

longer shit talking: nurble.com

shorter shit talking: nurble twitter

mail: nurbleATmacDOTcom

Sep 1
Woke up from a nap and the whole internet is talking about this? Weird…

Woke up from a nap and the whole internet is talking about this? Weird…


Aug 30

Aug 28

molls:

There’s a preview of my Drunk History narration up on the Comedy Central website now if you want a taste of my bimbo voice spitting out information about one of the coolest First Ladies in history. Alia Shawkat and Bobby Moynihan killed it.

See the full thing on September 2nd, Comedy Central, 10:30 PM 

Bonus fact: Derek and I clicked while we were filming this (he didn’t ask me out until a week later) and I was so drunk that I was basically throwing myself at him the whole time. The following day my co-worker Morgan asked me how the taping went and I put my hands on my head and said, “I don’t remember any of it, but I think I’m in love with Derek Waters.” If this story didn’t have a happy ending, I would be mortified forever and ever. 

This feels like an important milestone.


Aug 22

When I own a restaurant*

When I own a restaurant it will be almost exactly like Walter Foods in Williamsburg, but it will be as if the service staff have just given up.

Bottle of wine? We’re just going to yank the sleeve off the top and pound the cork in with a ballpoint pen (or, as was suggested last night, open it with an actual house key).

Bottle of beer? You bet we’re going to open that shit with a lighter. YES AT THE TABLE.

Every once in a while we will saber open a bottle of champagne, for no reason, but whoever does it will also have to be smoking a cigarette. Will we do this outside, for safety? Probably not, depends on if there are ceiling fans or not.

Oh, they’ll still wear bow ties, but they won’t be tied or anything. And if everybody could be wearing sunglasses, that’d be great.

*I will never own a restaurant. Only crazy people open restaurants, and only the truly insane ones succeed with them.


Aug 21

Whenever I try to explain something technical to a producer

renderplease:

They’re like:
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Aug 20

Aug 15
Wait. That can’t be right.

Wait. That can’t be right.


Aug 11
vicemag:

munchies:

Recipe: Blue Cheese Ice Cream
Serve it sundae-style with ganache, brandied cherries, and candied walnuts.

Look, don’t do this

St. Anselm was offering a version of this on their dessert menu for a while, though it was crusted with panko bits and garnished with a small slice of brûléed bacon. The first time I tried it, I swear it took a full two minutes to decide whether I liked it or not, but by the time I finished my serving, I was in love, and it held up through repeated encounters. Last time I was there, though, it had disappeared. When I asked after it, the server just sucked some air through his teeth, gazed into the middle distance, and said with a sigh, “Yeah, people either loved that, or they REALLY didn’t.”

vicemag:

munchies:

Recipe: Blue Cheese Ice Cream

Serve it sundae-style with ganache, brandied cherries, and candied walnuts.

Look, don’t do this

St. Anselm was offering a version of this on their dessert menu for a while, though it was crusted with panko bits and garnished with a small slice of brûléed bacon.

The first time I tried it, I swear it took a full two minutes to decide whether I liked it or not, but by the time I finished my serving, I was in love, and it held up through repeated encounters.

Last time I was there, though, it had disappeared. When I asked after it, the server just sucked some air through his teeth, gazed into the middle distance, and said with a sigh, “Yeah, people either loved that, or they REALLY didn’t.”


Jul 30

"If, every month, half the population eats the other half, we could go for 32 months[3] of cannibalism before the second-to-last person was eaten by the last.”

What do you mean you haven’t read the What If? about cannibalism yet?


Jul 25

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